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Worst Confessions. Best Intentions.

by Rocket Ship

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1.
I've forgotten how to be afraid since my world blew up in my face and now I lay around just laughing at myself. Day on days of self reflection turn into nights that I forget. I wish I could say I'm living well. I'm walking to kill idle time down all the streets we used to drive recalling conversations from three years ago. About that time was my last confession. So many sins that I regret. I'm building my portfolio. I tried to think outside the box and thought myself out on the rocks and now I don't know what i should do Because the last time I was here I was with you. Yea, the last time I was here, I had you. About that time was my last confession. About that time your first cigarette. A 26-month connection & I can't believe I said forget.
2.
Buckley 04:38
I'm not scared. why should I be? I'm well aware that we don't sleep And I don't dance Although I wish I could But if I move for you would you say I'm good I hope I see this one through because all I see is you this feels like a dream and it might be (this feels like a dream) girl you can break my heart if you want to you want to To not be scared true stupidity oh but how you sway knocks me off my feet and girl if I'm yours then Ill do no wrong I've got my secrets locked up in a book and buried under worries of cop cars knock me out roll your window down you're lying through your teeth but your smile is so sweet (you lie through your teeth) that I would be happy if you just stuck around so turn your lights down low oh baby Im not scared (I'll be your shot in the dark, I'll be your free throw) cmon baby just knock me out
3.
Absent 04:59
I fell asleep on the drive home and dreamt that I was two days younger when I felt control over the expectations that became the shovel I used to dig my hole. And I dig down until I am underground and I take one deep breath in and out And I stay awake now because I hate the thought of waking up to do it all again And I self-sabotage until its all I do, And from below I watch your branches bud and bloom. And I fell asleep on the drive home and dreamt that I could turn back time so I could bother because you don't bother to set alarms when your gone and I'm gone, oh I am so gone But I stay awake now because I hate the thought of waking up to do it all again And I self-sabotage until its all I do And from below I watch your branches bud and bloom. What if I said I keep my eyes wide open (eyes wide open) Like the nights when i stayed up wasted. A time before I was absent. (oh I'm absent) Back then it all made sense. Been trapped inside my head so long, I just want to leave.
4.
Out of Place 04:52
After thinking it over you're just like dust on my shoulder you're colder than the bottom of the earth and our shoes aren't the same size i could never walk in yours nor you in mine I saw you for the first time that I had in months the other night and the person that I used to "know" had different eyes. I'm not upset Im just out of place & if this is what you meant by a change in pace its getting worse with every passing day and every word you say. you've lost all the value in your face and you're not the same Im tired and I tried so hard to be there for you but these days I wish that you put in that effort too I saw your face in a different shade of gray and I've been seeing red since we went our separate ways believe me you've lost yourself completely but I never let things go to my head for if I did I'd be completely empty I said I didn't care when you said you didn't care at all you said we'd still be friends and that we would always stand tall I never thought those words would end up being my downfall you dragged me down in the dirt and mud to watch me crawl believe me you're no the same anymore and I'm just out of place.
5.
The last time / was here / was with you.
6.
Selfish 03:42
I thought this was for better But I guess I should have never Gotten our hopes up for forever Because I'm still waking up with your name on my tongue I'll always remember all the plans we made together to fulfill this year's November to make you feel alive like when you were young But now the lies at last come out you let me strip them to the bone to confirm a hopeful doubt but I guess I should have known and these recent revelations explain your need or space and why all my expectations got lost along the way and I know its selfish but I thought you believed in me ending my year under the weather I bet you think your fucking clever because you said if i ever do this to you there'd be a line waiting just out your door. So whats it like to be right because you were right? I lost my intuition and I lack foresight . And as for my contender,.. well he played the waiting game right. I'd still do anything you ask I still want you all alone remember me from better days as someone you adored. But call me up if you think that you're too drunk to drive. we'll steal the keys and find a way out for the night. when the smoke clears who's going to carry you home? Say my name if you think that you're too drunk to drive. I'll make sure you end up at your own place tonight. when the smoke clears who's going to carry you home? you say that you're fine & I say: "ok" I know you're not fine but I say: "ok"
7.
I got your message when I got out of work I could tell you were upset; I read you like a book. I figured that I'd come by. If I didn't you'd be up all night. When I pulled up to your house it was just quarter of 10 And I tried to think of words to make you understand. I didn't leave until past midnight and I still didn't have a clue.. Whats eating you. I don't want to know. Whats eating you? (just say it, say it Spit it out, spit it out) Why don't you lie to me? Say that you're okay because its easier on me. But if you keep me in the dark and try to hide behind all of the gray purgatories of your little lies, I guess i wouldn't feel so bad about mentioning the time. Don't get me wrong, I want to be involved. I just wish our conversations weren't monologues. But I guess I'll just run my mouth until I piss you off. you always say: I lie to myself and I lie to you and everyone else Just tell me whats eating you. I want to know. Whats eating you? Don't you dare lie to me saying you're okay because its easier on me. you always say: I'm fucking selfish and I don't want to hear about it I tell myself everyday to open up to you but inside I feel like my life is burning down and thats not what you wanted to hear oh no I fucking doubt it I'm fucking selfish and I don't care who knows about it I stand my ground everyday and I don't give up on you But inside I feel like my life is burning down and that not what you wanted to hear. no.
8.
When I take into account everything I've seen You don't want to be alone you just don't want to be with me. You keep crawling back to the same mistake that didn't work out from the beginning They say time heals all wounds so where did the time go? What about what I said to you on that late autumn day? it was a hopeful dream of mine and it felt real for a while to me. And its true that me and you are both better off on separate paths completely uninvolved. But that doesn't stop the constant wonder of 'what if you gave us a chance?' You bury me under all the words I thought I'd never hear you say and I will stay underground so you can dig me up in May. Surreal. It was so real to me. Oh you know it felt real to me. What about what I said to you on that late autumn day? It was a hopeful dream of mine and a dream it will stay. I never wanted to leave things this way. Our best memories are fading to gray. But things are so different now And we can't go back.
9.
"I've got to leave I've got to take some time for myself This one's all on me and I swear its not how it sounds." I guess that doesn't sound so bad no, not if you don't look deeper. Maybe forget all the things I said I meant though I swear that I believed them. To say what you mean... my god that seems unheard of. This is more like hell than it is like a dream and darling I'm so scared that you won't forgive me Because I know what I've seen. The only time you show those teeth of yours is when I'm spitting mine out on your floor & I hate to say it but if theres one thing I've learned its that, when it comes to love, I never learn I remember when we took that drive through your town & you showed me where you lived and told me about all the good times you had with your old friends. Ill be your new old friend. Then we parked on the side of the road and turned off the headlights. We sat in silence [and] I saw you smile but, god damn, girl,l would it kill you to smile just a little wider? The only time you show those teeth of yours is when I'm spitting mine out on your floor & I'll still keep your secrets safe though I don't have the strength to be up this late. you've go my stomach tied in knots so tight Because I can't help but wait until we bury the hatchet and make this right. The only time you show those teeth of yours is when I'm spitting mine out on your floor & I had to say it but if theres one thing I've learned its when it comes to love you never learn. The only time you let me in is after whiskey cokes and your tonic gin & I had to say it but I know that you'll agree if this ain't love then, baby, I've got to _

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released June 1, 2017

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Rocket Ship Worcester, Massachusetts

Rocket Ship is a four piece Alternative Pop Rock band based in Worcester, MA looking to write and perform meaningful music, make friends, travel the states and beyond, and have fun.

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